Woody Allen Queto

As the poet said, 'Only God can make a tree' -- probably because it's so hard to figure out how to get the bark on.

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I'm astounded by people who want to 'know' the universe when it's hard enough to find your way around Chinatown.

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Interestingly, according to modern astronomers, space is finite. This is a very comforting thought-- particularly for people who can never remember where they have left things.

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It seemed the world was divided into good and bad people. The good ones slept better... while the bad ones seemed to enjoy the waking hours much more.

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If it turns out that there is a God, I don't think that he's evil. But the worst that you can say about him is that basically he's an underachiever.

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More than any other time in history, mankind faces a crossroads. One path leads to despair and utter hopelessness. The other, to total extinction. Let us pray we have the wisdom to choose correctly.

Woody Allen